Intimate package looks at families upended by caregiving in pandemic
Betty Bednarowski. 79, braces herself against the walls as she walks to the living room while her daughter, Susan Ryder, watches from behind, in Rotterdam Junction, N.Y., Nov. 29, 2021. A year ago the family took on caregiving, pulling Bednarowski out of a nursing home where she suffered isolation and neglect during the COVID-19 lockdown. (AP Photo / Wong Maye-E)
By Adam Geller and Wong Maye-E
National writer Adam Geller and photographer Maye-E Wong teamed up for an powerful, bittersweet portrait of a family struggling to cope with an unexpected and unrelenting responsibility faced by thousands during the pandemic: caregiving for an elderly parent in the wake of nursing homes ravaged by COVID.
For this final installment of the 2021 series “Scars of Covid,” the pair spent days in Rotterdam Junction, N.Y., with Susan Ryder and her mother, Betty Bednarowski — who had been in desperate condition when the family brought her home from a nursing facility in lockdown. Geller and Wong sensitively chronicled the family’s exhausting routine of daily care as well as the uplifting moments of shared time with 79-year-old Betty.
Betty Bednarowski smiles as she bats a balloon back and forth with a nursing assistant at her daughter’s home in Rotterdam Junction, N.Y., Nov. 30, 2021. – AP Photo / Wong Maye-E
Betty Bednarowski strokes the cheek of her daughter, Susan Ryder, as they return from using the bathroom, in Rotterdam Junction, N.Y., Nov. 29, 2021. – AP Photo / Wong Maye-E
Susan Ryder, left, struggles to pull on compression stockings for her mother, Betty Bednarowski, in Rotterdam Junction, N.Y., Nov. 30, 2021. – AP Photo / Wong Maye-E
Susan Ryder kneels and catches her breath after struggling with her mother to remove compression stockings at the end of the day, in Rotterdam Junction, N.Y., Nov. 29, 2021. – AP Photo / Wong Maye-E
Betty Bednarowski traces the patterns on her placemat during dinner in Rotterdam Junction, N.Y., Nov. 29, 2021. – AP Photo / Wong Maye-E
Jimmy Ryder rests as his wife, Susan Ryder, dances with her mother, Betty Bednarowski, seen in the reflection of a mirror, in Rotterdam Junction, N.Y., Nov. 29, 2021. Ryder placed the mirror in front of her mother so that she can see herself, but Betty often does not recognizing the reflection to be her own, waving and saying, “Hi” or “She’s back.” – AP Photo / Wong Maye-E
Jimmy Ryder feeds his mother-in-law, Betty Bednarowski, during dinner, in Rotterdam Junction, N.Y., Nov. 29, 2021. – AP Photo / Wong Maye-E
Susan Ryder wipes her face in Rotterdam Junction, N.Y. Dec. 1, 2021, as she recalls having to make a decision with the rest of her family about taking her mother back from a nursing home that was in COVID-19 lockdown. – AP Photo / Wong Maye-E
Betty Bednarowski looks at her dolls, which she calls her “babies,” as she sits in her chair most of the day, in Rotterdam Junction, N.Y., Nov. 29, 2021. – AP Photo / Wong Maye-E
Susan Ryder, left, supports her mother, Betty Bednarowski, as they gently dance their way toward the bathroom, in Rotterdam Junction, N.Y., Nov. 29, 2021. – AP Photo / Wong Maye-E
Susan Ryder, left, and her mother, Betty Bednarowski, press their hands together as they listen to music, in Rotterdam Junction, N.Y., Nov. 29, 2021. – AP Photo / Wong Maye-E
Betty Bednarowski waves at the table during breakfast, in Rotterdam Junction, N.Y., Nov. 30, 2021. –
Susan Ryder, left, laughs as she humors herself while struggling to remove compression stockings for her mother, Betty Bednarowski, ahead of dinner, in Rotterdam Junction, N.Y., Nov. 29, 2021. – AP Photo / Wong Maye-E
Jimmy Ryder supports his mother-in-law, Betty Bednarowski, as his wife, Susan Ryder, takes off her mom’s coat, in Rotterdam Junction, N.Y., Nov. 29, 2021. – AP Photo / Wong Maye-E
Susan Ryder prepares to take her dog out for a walk in Rotterdam Junction, N.Y., Dec. 1, 2021. – AP Photo / Wong Maye-E
Susan Ryder supports herself at home in Rotterdam Junction, N.Y., Nov. 30, 2021, as she pauses to reflect on the “ups and downs” of caregiving for her mother over the past year. – AP Photo / Wong Maye-E
Jimmy and Susan Ryder spend their evening playing with their dog, Captain, and reading the paper when they finally have time to themselves after Susan’s mother has gone to bed, in Rotterdam Junction, N.Y., Nov. 29, 2021. – AP Photo / Wong Maye-E
Betty Bednarowski, right, and her daughter, Susan Ryder, dance-walk their way to the bathroom ahead of dinner in Rotterdam Junction, N.Y., Nov. 29, 2021. – AP Photo / Wong Maye-E
Susan Ryder sits quietly at the breakfast table in Rotterdam Junction, N.Y., Nov. 29, 2021, as she recounts the emotional period of not being able to visit her mother during the COVID lockdown of nursing homes. A year ago the family decided to bring her mother home. – AP Photo / Wong Maye-E
Betty Bednarowski, left, and her daughter, Susan Ryder, whisper to each other as Bednarowski goes to bed for the night, in Rotterdam Junction, N.Y., Nov. 29, 2021. – AP Photo / Wong Maye-E
Wong also recorded audio and worked with producer Samantha Shotzbarger on an evocative audio piece that brought another layer of humanity to the journalism. And Shotzbarger brought all the elements together in compelling online presentation.
Discharges from nursing homes are up during the pandemic, and Geller sought out other families that have made the decision to take on caregiving. In most cases the story was the same: Happy moments tinged with incredible stress for adult children whose lives were upended by the hours of care their elderly loved ones require.
The story drew more than 100,000 pageviews in its first day and topped AP’s reader engagement scores.